Firewalking Blog Post
PowerWe Underestimate Ourselves
July 29, 2026
About the Picture
"Shame". Drawn and broken by one of my fellow travelers at our ACA meeting. Think his art fits this article well. Shame is a weed that doesn't just affect one area of our lives. It spreads and digs into everything we are.
"Perfectionism is a self destructive and addictive belief system that fuels this primary thought: If I look perfect, and do everything perfectly, I can avoid or minimize the painful feelings of shame, judgment, and blame." -- Brené Brown
Not just in firewalking circles, but we underestimate ourselves in our work, our accomplishments, and even our vacations. “Oh, it was ok.” Meanwhile, it is an experience that most people haven’t done or will.
We create something, prepare a meal, do something nice for someone else. “Oh, it was nothing.” We minimize what we do, to stay small, to avoid becoming a target of criticism or even worse, praise.
We imagine all of our faults being on display for all to see. Ignoring the simple truth that everyone else has the same insecurities. Some people internalize them; others like to point to faults in others. "Look over there, don’t look at me."
If you're in ACA or other 12 Step program, we underestimate ourselves for surviving our addictions, childhood, or whatever else led us to seek recovery work. We are in such a minority. Most of us want to stay in the dark.
We underestimate ourselves by going to a meeting and taking a seat for the first time and realizing that we need help. Again, the masses hide and walk on by.
We underestimate ourselves with our consistency with our program work. Berating ourselves for not being perfect and for not working a perfect program, all the time.
We underestimate the capacity of a Higher Power to accept and love us. It is easier to blame our Higher Power than to accept help.
We underestimate ourselves during a board break. Thinking that we are going to be the only one not to break it. Then we forget when we do.
We underestimate ourselves by taking that first step at a firewalk, thinking it was someone else, some trick, or a fluke.
We underestimate ourselves to play it safe, to stay small, to avoid criticism, to keep that critical part of ourselves content and quiet.
We underestimate ourselves because we had to as children, but we are no longer children! We have power, skills, and agency!
Upcoming Events
We usually break up our events into two parts. Since we have limited workshop seating. The firewalk builds upon the workshop, but it is a separate experience.
Register early for workshop and workbook. Please call 732-561-8358 with any questions.
Limiting Beliefs Board Break
09/19/2026 Saturday (Manalapan, NJ)
What are limiting beleifs? A prison without doors or walls that exists only in your mind. How do they hold you back in life? Without most of us even noticing.
We will do some writing assignments, share, watch a video, draw/write our negative beliefs on wooden boards, and we'll take turns breaking them with our hands. It is a powerful feeling to do something you feel you can't. (Good starting point for people interested in fire walking).
Glasswalk
10/24/2026 Saturday (Manalapan, NJ)
A firewalk happens pretty fast usually within a few seconds. A Glasswalk, by comparison, is much slower. An eight foot long path of broken glass. We navigate it deliberatly and adjust our footing to keep moving forward toward our goal.
Burn the Boats Firewalk
11/07/2026 Saturday (Manalapan, NJ)
Join us for an evening of connection. We connect to each other, to ourselves, and to the fire. We write letters that we offer to the fire. Talk about time. We share why we are here. We write and talk about where we run to when we are afraid--our boats. Then we'll burn them at the fire and embrace a new path with a ten foot firewalk!
Check our events page for more information.